Christmas is coming and the goose is getting fat and all that. Actually, it’s probably already dead and stuffed by now, but I digress…
Digiboy and I were discussing wines for Christmas Dinner and he told me about a conversation he’d had with his Dad about the value of wine. His pop just couldn't understand how wine could ever be worth more than a fiver. What Digiboy needed was Winebird analogy -and fast.
People like cars, don’t they? Some people LOVE cars and can talk about the finer points of carburetors (I had to look that up) for hours. Do we call them Car Ponces, though? Do we? We do not.
From my side, even if I could, I wouldn't spend £80,000+ on a sports car to get me from A to B as my Ford Fiesta can do the same for £5,000. The difference would be wasted. I would not appreciate all those little details: the softer suspension, the way the lights turn on when they sense the dark, or acceleration for example. Not only that, I wouldn’t even enjoy the experience. It would be terrifying! The only way would be for me to work up through driving bigger and better cars, increasing my confidence and experience along the way. Only then would I even attempt driving one of those sporty machines.
Well, wine is exactly the same. While more expensive wines are occasionally instantly gorgeous to everyone, quite a lot of them actually have a bit of an acquired taste. Fine Burgundian Pinot Noir with a bit of age on it for example, has aromas – famously- of manure. MANURE, I tell you! The first time I tried it, I wanted to be sick. It seemed thin, it stank of pig poo and was just plain weird. Nowadays however, after tasting all kinds of wines at all price levels, I would kill to go back to that tasting and down the lot! We really have to work our way up and pay attention to appreciate the subtle differences in certain wines - those from ancient vines for example, or those who have been entirely hand-made. Believe me, these nuances are there to be celebrated and it's an amazing feeling when you can pick them out.
So, my advice to you all would be to start at the bottom, maybe with one particular grape or area, and work your way up the price scale. I guarantee that quite soon, you’ll have that Eureka moment in your local pub or restaurant when you fancy a glass of red, go for one you used to drink and exclaim very loudly: ‘This is sh**t!’.
Congratulations – you will have become a wine ponce, fully fledged speaker of wine language and will be skint forever more, pouring all your hard earned cash in to greater and greater little slices of heaven! But you know what? You’ll be very happy. And drunk.
Joyeux Noel,
WInebird x
Digiboy and I were discussing wines for Christmas Dinner and he told me about a conversation he’d had with his Dad about the value of wine. His pop just couldn't understand how wine could ever be worth more than a fiver. What Digiboy needed was Winebird analogy -and fast.
People like cars, don’t they? Some people LOVE cars and can talk about the finer points of carburetors (I had to look that up) for hours. Do we call them Car Ponces, though? Do we? We do not.
From my side, even if I could, I wouldn't spend £80,000+ on a sports car to get me from A to B as my Ford Fiesta can do the same for £5,000. The difference would be wasted. I would not appreciate all those little details: the softer suspension, the way the lights turn on when they sense the dark, or acceleration for example. Not only that, I wouldn’t even enjoy the experience. It would be terrifying! The only way would be for me to work up through driving bigger and better cars, increasing my confidence and experience along the way. Only then would I even attempt driving one of those sporty machines.
Well, wine is exactly the same. While more expensive wines are occasionally instantly gorgeous to everyone, quite a lot of them actually have a bit of an acquired taste. Fine Burgundian Pinot Noir with a bit of age on it for example, has aromas – famously- of manure. MANURE, I tell you! The first time I tried it, I wanted to be sick. It seemed thin, it stank of pig poo and was just plain weird. Nowadays however, after tasting all kinds of wines at all price levels, I would kill to go back to that tasting and down the lot! We really have to work our way up and pay attention to appreciate the subtle differences in certain wines - those from ancient vines for example, or those who have been entirely hand-made. Believe me, these nuances are there to be celebrated and it's an amazing feeling when you can pick them out.
So, my advice to you all would be to start at the bottom, maybe with one particular grape or area, and work your way up the price scale. I guarantee that quite soon, you’ll have that Eureka moment in your local pub or restaurant when you fancy a glass of red, go for one you used to drink and exclaim very loudly: ‘This is sh**t!’.
Congratulations – you will have become a wine ponce, fully fledged speaker of wine language and will be skint forever more, pouring all your hard earned cash in to greater and greater little slices of heaven! But you know what? You’ll be very happy. And drunk.
Joyeux Noel,
WInebird x
